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by Jennifer AbeggThis is not the life I would have chosen for myself. No. If I had my way, I'd have been married by now. Actually, I'd have celebrated my fifth wedding anniversary. I'd probably be driving some sports utility vehicle or mom-mobile filled with children.
But that's not my life. Instead, I'm not married. I have no children. I don't drive an SUV. But I do lead the life God has chosen for me.
Surprisingly, I love it.
In the last year with my job I traveled around the United States and I zigzagged the globe, visiting the continents of Europe, Asia and Africa all for the first time. I saw ancient artifacts and artwork, learned about new cultures, took a dip in the Mediterranean Sea and tasted a plethora of new foods. I accrued enough frequent flyer miles in one year to qualify for another free trip to Europe.
If at the beginning of time, God pulled me aside and asked, "Jennifer, how would you like for me to orchestrate your life?" I wouldn't have even thought to petition for overseas travel, because I'd have been so focused on getting married and having lots of little ones. But if I were married and a mother, I wouldn't have had the opportunities to travel.
I still long to be married though. This year, just after turning 26, I got a not-so-gentle reminder from Newsweek magazine that my biological clock is ticking. It's an uphill battle to conceive after 27, I read.
To make matters worse, my boyfriend, the man I thought I would marry, had just ended our relationship on my birthday. My adrenaline started pumping as if for a race to find a husband.
But then God delicately reminded me-and continues to remind me that "God withholds no good thing from those whose walks are blameless" (Psalm 84:11). As long as I harbor no unconfessed sin in my heart, then my walk is righteous, and I can trust that I am in the center of God's will. I trust Him. So far this life has been much more of an adventure than I could have hoped for. It's not what I would have chosen, but God's wisdom is higher, and therefore, His choice better.
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