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by Laurie McMahonI would like to tell you about my spiritual journey.
There was an emptiness in my heart that could not be filled.
I grew up knowing God but had no real connection to Him. Growing up was different for me than most other children because I never knew my earthly father. My family always did the very best they could for me, but they could never fill the emptiness I felt in my heart.
I led a good life and strived for perfection in everything. I thought by trying to do everything perfectly, there would never be a reason for anyone to pass unfavorable judgment on me. On the outside it looked like I had everything, but on the inside I was bitter and empty.
When I met my father for the first time it filled the void in my heart but it also created a new longing.
In 1997, God gave me the one thing I had always desired: I met my dad for the first time. Meeting him not only filled the void I felt in my heart, but it also caused me to seek a personal relationship with Jesus. I had never really paid a lot of attention to God before other than to get down on my knees with a wish list.
Through an advertisement in the newspaper, I learned about and started attending a ladies' church group. One day while reading my Bible, I recognized I owed everything to God and prayed to receive Jesus into my life. After this I didn't immediately feel like a changed person, so I thought I had done something wrong.
A banner advertising a website caught my attention and began a surprising series of events.
In January 2001, I noticed the "Power to Change" banners on some of the churches around our neighborhood. I connected with the website www.powertochange.com and linked up with "Christian Women Today".
When I logged on to their Christian chat line, the chat hostess engaged me in a conversation. We talked about my spiritual life and I told her I wasn’t sure that I was even a Christian because I hadn’t been going to church. The hostess responded by walking me through the process of how to receive Christ, which I indicated I had already done.
So she began sharing with me how to be filled with the Holy Spirit. That’s when I came to realize that even though I had accepted Jesus into my life, I was still living the life of a defeated Christian. I prayed to give control of my life to God. I believe the Lord made a divine appointment that night on the chat session and the very goodness of God is what led me there.
The next week, I returned to the chat room. Amazingly, I learned that the hostess and I lived in the same town! She referred me to a local church where I got involved in the ALPHA discipleship program.
Since then my life has been completely transformed. I am now truly at peace with God.
That is not to say nothing ever goes wrong, but now I draw on the power of the Holy Spirit. There is now purpose in everything I do. God has been so good and I am thankful for the incredible work He has done in my heart.
Now, today, I’m back in the Christian Women Today chat room, but this time, I’m serving as a volunteer hostess. I get to encourage women like I once was—searching the Internet for spiritual answers.
A verse that is particularly meaningful for me is: "Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ" (Romans 5:1).
God wants to be our leverage in living, empowering us to feel better about ourselves, more excited about our future, more grateful for those we love and more enthusiastic about our faith.
If you are a believer in Jesus Christ, God has given you His Holy Spirit to help you live life according to His perfect plan. Why not pray this simple prayer and by faith invite Him to fill you with His Spirit:
Dear Father, I need you. I acknowledge that I have sinned against you by directing my own life. I thank you that You have forgiven my sins through Christ's death on the cross for me. I now invite Christ to again take His place on the throne of my life. Fill me with the Holy Spirit as You commanded me to be filled, and as You promised in Your Word that You would do if I asked in faith. I pray this in the name of Jesus. As an expression of my faith, I thank You for directing my life and for filling me with the Holy Spirit. Amen.
