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by David & Claudia Arp, MSSW authors of LOVE LIFE FOR PARENTS, THE SECOND HALF OF MARRIAGE, and 10 GREAT DATES TO REVITALIZE YOUR MARRIAGE**We love what Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "There never was a child so lovely but his [parents] were glad to get him asleep."
Getting the kids to bed can be a challenge--especially with challenging kids. We still remember how our first child had us trained at age 20 months to sit in the "night-night" chair until he was sound asleep. That was after we read five books without skipping pages! But we learned that if we were going to build our marriage while parenting our kids, the bedtime challenge had to be met sometimes with brute force!
Now we could always get our kids in bed--the problem was keeping them there! After ten more glasses of water, five potty trips, and four more stories, we were also ready for bed. We were totally exhausted! Forget marriage enrichment!
How can you take some of the hassle out of getting your children to bed so you'll have energy left for your spouse?
Here are some of the best tips from other parents:
Have a bedtime routine. Children love rituals so come up with your own rituals. When you set a new bedtime routine, start it a half hour before you want to turn out lights and say a final goodnight.
Give your child a stuffed animal or blanket to cuddle and take to bed with him or her.
Once your child is in bed and lights are turned out, don't read another story, sing another song, apologize, argue, beg.
Reward good behaviour.
If nothing works, consult your pediatrician. He or she may have some great suggestions for you to try.
Don't make it rewarding for your child to get out of bed and come into yours. And on those occasions that they do, remember to cuddle with each other--not just the child!
Here's some good advice. Never, but never, entertain or socialize in the middle of the night. Just be a total bore!
The next morning, you can be your adorable self again. And know that someday, your child will sleep through the night!
You know, there really isn't anything as lovely as a sleeping kid!
David and Claudia Arp are the founders and directors of Marriage Alive International and conduct seminars across the United States and Europe. David received a MSW from the University of Tennessee and Claudia holds a bachelor's degree in Home Economics Education from the University of Georgia. The Arps authored an Occasional paper for the United Nations International Year of the Family, 1994, have written over 15 books dealing with marriage and family enrichment, are national radio broadcasters with their program "The Family
Workshop," and are currently columnists with New Man Magazine. They have three married adult sons, five grandchildren, and live in Knoxville, Tenn.
Visit the Marriage Alive Web site at: http://www.marriagealive.com
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** These titles are or will be available at your local bookstore, by calling1-800-727-3480, or by e-mailing zdsonline@zph.com. If you are outside the U.S., e-mail zpub@zph.com for a list of Zondervan's international distributors.
-reprinted with permission from the ZONDERVAN PUBLISHING HOUSE E-MAIL ALERT SERVICE newsletter, http://www.zondervan.com
